Nobody's Girl by Virginia Roberts Giuffre

This may be the saddest book I have ever read. There are so many tragic events in Virginia's life that at times I simply had to put it down and breathe deeply. This book, and Virginia's life, is the result of early childhood betrayal trauma. Betrayal trauma is when someone that you love and trust, like a parent, violates the trust that they will take care of you. I cannot stop thinking about how Virginia's life could have turned out if she had not been betrayed by her parents. It makes me sick to my stomach. Her father started sexually abusing Virginia in the bathtub by the time she was 6 or 7 years old. (Both ages are mentioned in the book.) Her mother was completely aware of what was going on and she let it happen. They are both disgusting human beings. Her father then "swapped" her with another man's daughter. This "friend" of her fathers continued the sexual abuse. It sickens me. What's even worse, Virginia wanted to try to have a relationship with each of her parents (divorced) long into her adulthood. That's what betrayal trauma does to the brain. It changes the brain chemistry at such an early age that it can't ever be repaired.

It's this early childhood abuse/trauma that led Virginia to Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell. She simply didn't think she deserved better. Epstein and Maxwell started sexually abusing Virginia at their first "massage" when she was a young teenager. They used her body; sold it; abused it; encouraged other men to use it and abuse it; while telling her how special she was. She was Epstein's "special girl" and Ghislaine was the "mother figure" in her life. All Virginia wanted is to be safe and loved. She wanted to be protected and feel like she had a place in this world. They gave her that, in her traumatized mind.

Now let's make Virginia's life even worse after she finally feels empowered enough (after years of therapy) to report what happened to her. She put herself out there to try to take down very powerful men and women so that they couldn't continue to harm the innocent. She was raked over the coals by lawyers, the media, and Epstein supporters. It's appalling. She was called a liar, a gold digger, an attention-seeker. What is WRONG with people. 

Finally, the "cherry on top" of this tragic life: her husband physically abused her. In the book, she talked about him like he was her hero. She couldn't say enough about how wonderful he was; what a great, supportive husband; what a wonderful father. This is the final proof that childhood betrayal trauma lasts a lifetime. She simply could not admit that after everything she had lived through; everything that she had suffered through; she was still an abused woman who believed that she didn't deserve more. Dead by suicide at age 41.

Virginia Roberts Giuffre: You. Deserved. More.

Wendy's Rating: *****