My Friends by Fredrik Backman

One incredible talent that Fredrik Backman has when writing his stories is that he can make you fall in love with his flawed, unhappy, quirky, unbalanced, lonely, grumpy, but loyal characters. He also has an interesting way of telling a story. He doesn't tell this story in a linear fashion. He doesn't even introduce one of the main characters in the book until Chapter 17. Not only do the chapters rotate between the summer when the kids are 14 years old and 25 years later, but the story jumps around within these chapters. And yet, it's easy to follow, which is amazing. He just makes it flow.

This is a story of four friends: Joar, Ted, Ali, and "the artist". You don't find out the artist's actual name until the end of the book. They live in a town by the sea. They are all poor and they each come from disturbingly dysfunctional families. Their personalities are extremely different from each other. But they love each other - deeply. What's even more important is that they believe in each other. One of the messages in this book is that a person's life can veer off into a completely different direction just by one person saying to another, "You are good enough. I believe in you." It's a very powerful message.

Despite each of these kids having a family to go home to, at the heart of it, they only have each other. Joar's father is an extremely violent, abusive man who beats up on his wife and son relentlessly. Joar always returns home to try to protect his mother, who loves him deeply. Ted's father has been seriously ill with cancer for so many years that he doesn't really even know the man he used to be. His mother has a difficult time expressing love, and Ted's older brother beats up on him - and hangs with a really tough crowd. (Plus, Ted is gay, and all his family wants for him is to be a MAN.) The artist's mother is an addict and his dad works on the wharf with all the other tough men (like Joar's father). Ali moves around a lot with her father because he is always in debt and is always running from the people he owes money to.

We hear about the summer these kids are 14 through Ted (25 years later) telling Louisa. Louisa meets the artist (and through him, Ted) when she is 17 turning 18. Louisa has run away from her last foster home and runs into the artist in an alley behind a church. Louisa spray paints the walls of the church and the artist sees how talented she is. The artist believes in her the way Joar believed in him all those years ago.

Truly, this is a story of friendship, loyalty, and unconditional love. I laughed. I cried. I connected to these characters that lived lives so differently than my own. That's great storytelling.

Wendy's Rating: *****

Lightbreakers by Aja Gabel

This is one of those books that I simply had to "power through" for the first 125 pages. I'm one of those people who finish every book I start, hoping it will get better if I keep reading. I'm glad I didn't give up on this one. Quantum physics fascinates me at a superficial level. Meaning, I like reading about time travel, but I don't really want to read about the science of it. I'm also disinterested in art such as paintings & sculpture - unless it's tied to a good story. So, since two of the main characters (Noah & Maya, husband & wife) are a quantum physicist and an artist, I didn't think I could get through it! Fortunately, between pages 125-150, the story turned more personal in nature rather than scientific, and I finally got engaged.

Noah and Maya have been married for three years. Noah had previously been married to Eileen (they were together for 16 years) and they had a daughter who died suddenly at the age of 4. Noah and Eileen ended up divorcing after their daughter's death. Noah has never moved on from his daughter's death - or Eileen - even though he really seemed to love Maya. When he is offered an opportunity by a billionaire to work on a secret project in quantum physics, he jumps at the chance and Noah & Maya move to the project site in Texas. The project involves traveling back in time. Noah trains his mind to focus on a memory, blocking everything else from his mind, injecting himself with a "product", entering a "bath" naked and then reliving the memory. He practices by going back in time just a number of minutes. Once he gets the hang of it, he starts going back in time to see his daughter, Serena, before she dies. He eventually figures out that Klein (the billionaire) wants to prove causality and he is using Noah as a test subject.

This project, which consumes Noah, puts a significant strain on his marriage to Maya. She leaves him to return to Japan, her home country, to visit her parents and take a break from Noah and their marriage. Meanwhile, Noah calls Eileen and asks her to come to Texas so she can "see" Serena with him. These three individuals make discoveries about themselves and it's interesting to watch how they change the way they think about things - in the past, present, and future. These are highly intelligent characters, but they have to be reminded that people's minds are unreliable. Memories are faulty & inconsistent. Memories are not just an "event", but a collection of things. Eileen tells Noah, "That's what memories are like. Living things made up of your experience, plus my experience, plus Esther's experience. All of it happening at once, the truth of it somewhere in the middle, the objective truth not even important at all." Noah asks Eileen what is important and she responds, "That you heard me say what you needed to hear. I heard myself say what I needed to hear. That's the truth." Later on in the book, Maya's mother tells Maya, "You know, it is possible for two people to have two different memories and experiences of the same thing." Noah learns in the end that he was looking for the wrong thing. He was looking for a way to "reverse the irreversible, instead of finding the permanence."

One more interesting thing that was discussed in the book (between Noah and his daughter). Serena says that black holes are bad because they break light. Noah explains to her that being a "lightbreaker" isn't necessarily bad. He acknowledges that a black hole traps and breaks light, but when it breaks, something new develops out of it. Love this explanation, especially as it pertains to the message in this book.

Wendy's Rating for the first 125 pages: ***

Wendy's Rating for the rest of the book: ****

Last One Seen by Rebecca Kanner

Awww....writers and mental illnesses. What could go wrong? To really appreciate the layers of this story, you have to be familiar with bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder. I do, (since I work in the field), but even I wanted to shake Hannah to knock some sense into her. Hannah is a want-to-be writer who's biggest desire is to attend a graduate program to complete a creative writing MFA at Washington University in St. Louis, MO. She gets accepted, but she doesn't get a stipend so she can't afford to go. She finds out that another applicant, Justine Updike (supposedly distantly related to John Updike) was offered a spot - and a stipend - but hasn't chosen what graduate program she will attend. (She was accepted into 10 different programs.) If Justine decides to go somewhere else, Hannah will get the stipend. BUT, Hannah is fascinated (obsessed) with Justine and wants them both to attend the program together. So Hannah figures out a way to earn the money after Justine chooses to attend Washington University. (I am extremely doubtful she could earn as much money as she did selling a trumped up health food product in that short of time, but that's how she does it.)

Hannah has been living with bipolar disorder - and was raised by a mother with borderline personality disorder. Both her mother and Justine treat Hannah horribly, but just as she craved whatever attention her mother could give her intermittently during her childhood, she craves Justine's attention. Justine is an awful person, but she is idolized by others in the program, including Hannah. Hannah's one true friend in the program is Claire, who tries very, very hard to help Hannah (reminding her to take her meds, not drink or do drugs, focus on something other than Justine), but Hannah manages to alienate her as well because of her behavior and poor choices. Then enter Eli, the handsome, mysterious, man who Hannah falls for after she sees him with Justine. Hannah cycles through manic episodes, blackmails the director of the creative writing program, gets accused of theft, driving under the influence, etc. Her life is a mess. Then someone is shot and killed with Hannah's gun. Hannah is not sure who did it since she experiences blackouts (due to drugs/alcohol she willingly or unknowingly ingests.)

This book is a rollercoaster ride. Since Hannah doesn't know what's real and not real, the reader doesn't really know either. Honestly, the only character in the book that I really liked was Claire! (And Luke, the bartender at Hannah's previous job before she moved to grad school.) Claire talks about "observer bias" in one of the groups' writer's workshops. She states, "We're all unreliable narrators...Everything that's written is just someone's perspective...We are distorted by observation...We filter everything through our own biases." I love that!

 It's hard to read about a person's downward spiral due to bad decisions and manipulations by others. The end is satisfying however.

Wendy's Rating: ****

Before I Forget by Tory Henwood Hoen

This novel really hit home with me. I think anyone who has experienced a family member with Alzheimer's would find value in this story. Not only does it share one way an Alzheimer's diagnosis affects a person and their family/caregivers, but it also explores feelings of guilt that people hang on to deep into their lives, even if the reason they feel guilty was actually beyond their control. A quote from the book summarizes it really well. "'I was convinced it was my fault. Like I said, guilt is conniving. It befriends your ego and tries to convince you that everything's about you - the past, the future. But it's just not true. The only thing we ever have is the present, and we do the best we can with it.'"

Cricket is a 27 year old that is a lost soul. She quits her job suddenly after acknowledging that she simply can't do it anymore. She has been at her boss's beck and call for the last two years and it's far from meaningful to her. She is a college dropout who blames herself for the death of her (former) boyfriend when they were 16 years old. She is drifting through life. She hasn't been to her hometown for ten years, and there is a disconnect between her and her parents, as well as her sister, Nina, even though they all communicate with each other. Cricket & Nina's father was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease and Nina has spent the last four years living with him and taking care of him. (Their parents divorced four months after the death of Cricket's boyfriend, so that just adds to Cricket's feelings of guilt. She blames herself for that too.)

Nina is offered a job of a lifetime in Sweden so she tells Cricket that they need to move their dad into a memory care home. Cricket has to return to her hometown in the Adirondacks to tour the options. Once there, Cricket makes the decision to stay and take care of their father on her own. Nina is definitely skeptical, to say the least. Nina is the responsible, disciplined, detail-oriented, controlled older sister. Cricket is the lost, free spirit. Since Nina only plans to stay in Sweden for a year, or possibly two, they both see this as an opportunity to allow their father to stay in his home a bit longer though. So, the plan is made.

This is a story about people's hearts "regenerating". "...[M]aybe our hearts don't ache because they're scarred or broken or because something is wrong. Maybe they ache because they are shape-shifting." Our hearts make us, "quake with change". "Not our final selves, or our best selves, or even our improved selves, but just our next selves." People don't need to be told what their future holds for them. They need to be told what their future could hold for them. Wonderful story.

Wendy's Rating: *****

9 Dragons by Michael Connelly

Harry Bosch #14. So this book included some twists that I was most definitely not expecting!  Harry's life is messy. He has his strengths, but he can also be judgmental and pigheaded, which drives me crazy at times. He doesn't really do a lot of "perspective taking".  There are three substantial things that happen in this story that changes his life dramatically. I am thinking he will be forced to look at certain things differently going forward. Time will tell.

Bosch and his partner, Ferras, are sent to Fortune Liquors (located in a bad part of LA) to investigate the death of the owner. He is found shot to death behind the counter of his store. The murder is assumed to be a robbery gone wrong. After watching a couple of saved videos from the store camera, Bosch suspects that the owner, John Li was paying the triad, a Chinese custom of protection, and that it was the triad that had him killed. A detective, David Chu, from the Asian Gang Unit (AGU), is called in on the case as well. He speaks Chinese and acts as an interpreter for the Li family. John Li had a wife, a daughter (Mia) who lives with them and takes care of them, and a son (Robert) who owns and runs a second (nicer) Fortune Liquors store in a nicer area of LA.

As Harry digs deeper and deeper into this case, his frustration with Ferras builds. He wants Ferras to be "actively" committed to the job, rather than always wanting to stay behind and do the paperwork and other desk-related tasks. Ferras also has a wife and three young children he is responsible for. Harry just doesn't get Ferras' perspective on the job or life in general. Harry is also suspicious of detective Chu. Harry is suspicious of everyone involved with the case actually, which is par for the course with him. He definitely made me suspicious of everyone too! Anyway, his investigation leads to Hong Kong after he receives a video from someone who abducted his daughter, Maddie, who is now 13 years old and has spent the last six years living in Hong Kong with her mother. (Eleanor Wish, Harry's ex-wife) Harry connects with Eleanor (who I'm still not a fan of!) and her significant other, Sun Yee, to find Maddie. Harry suspects that a member of the triad who killed John Li is Maddie's abductor.

There are several twists and turns which are surprising. You never know what's going to happen in these stories. That's what I love about them!

Wendy's Rating: ****

Shatter Me by Tahereh Mafi

I couldn't resist starting this trilogy. If someone tells me it's similar to the Hunger Games trilogy, I have to read it! Shatter Me is a dystopian story about a 17-year old girl named Juliette. She has been living in deplorable conditions in a prison cell, being fed minimal food, with limited opportunities for personal hygiene. She was imprisoned because of something she did (which we don't initially know.) What we do know is that her touch will kill. If she touches anyone, or anyone touches her - bare skin to bare skin - they will most likely die. Even before being imprisoned, she lived a life of isolation. Her own parents didn't love her. She was considered a diseased freak.

One day she gets a cellmate. His name is Adam Kent and she recognizes him from her elementary school days. He treats her poorly, but she helps him anyway by showing him the ropes of prison life that she had to learn the hard way. Shortly after Adam's arrival, however, she is released into the hands of Warner, the young leader of the "new world". She soon finds out that Adam was sent in to test her. Adam is a soldier for Warner. Warner doesn't see Juliette as a freak. He sees her as power. He sees her as a weapon he can use against his enemies (the rebels). Juliette is not on board with this new arrangement, and fights against Warner's wishes, until she discovers that Adam will be severely punished (beaten) if she doesn't conform. Juliette does not want to harm anyone ever, not even the people who abuse her. She is frightened of her ability to kill.

She figures out that Adam does indeed remember her from their early school days. He volunteered to go into her prison cell. He has a different motive than Warner does for Juliette however. We also find out that Adam is immune from Juliette's special powers, which is helpful of course! Then all hell breaks loose! Everyone (Warner, Adam, the rebels) wants Juliette. Things gets dicey when Adam & Juliette escape from Warner's compound. Juliette has no idea what's really "outside" in the rest of the world. If I had already been in possession of the second book of this trilogy, I would have started it immediately. Unfortunately, I don't. It's a quick read and definitely intriguing. I do love dystopian novels!

Wendy's Rating: ****

The Women by Kristin Hannah

I am a huge Kristin Hannah fan. I have read most of what she has written, including before she ventured into writing historical fiction. I have only rated one of her novels 4 stars instead of 5 stars, and I know that rating was not a popular opinion! Ha! I just didn't like how whiny the main character was. Anyway, I digress. I really loved this book. This was definitely a 5 star read for me! It was painful to read at times, but honest. My father served in the Air Force during the Vietnam War. He didn't see combat (fortunately). I was too young to know what was going on in our country at that time, but I have always felt awful for the returning veterans. Many of them didn't even have the choice to go to war! So why were they treated so terribly when they returned to the US? After WWI and WWII it was considered honorable to fight for one's freedom from tyranny. That's what they thought they were doing. It's not their fault that we were losing the war and that the US continued to send young men (and women!) to their deaths even after the tide had turned and the US realized it was a fruitless battle. It's deplorable and makes me heartsick. What I didn't know is that the women serving in this war were not considered "veterans". They also saw the horrors of war.

The story portrayed Frankie's despair very effectively. First, being treated like a second-class citizen by her father (as many - most? - females were back then, including in my own military family); being betrayed by the man she loved; being told that "women" were not in Vietnam over and over again; being told that she was not considered a Vietnam vet after serving two terms; not being able to get help from the VA Hospital; becoming a victim to addiction because of the lack of knowledge about the mental & emotional damage done to active duty soldiers -  and surgery nurses in the field! (PTSD); being exposed to Agent Orange continually, which caused women to miscarry.

The entire book I was praying for a happy ending for Frankie. I wanted her to be acknowledged by her father. I wanted her to feel loved. I wanted her to become stronger because of her traumatic experiences instead of succumb to them. She had two amazing best friends (Barb & Ethel) that supported her, fortunately. I'm not sure where she would have ended up if it wasn't for them. She also ended up having incredible, loving support from a man she couldn't quite marry. He was really awesome. The ending was what I hoped for. Thank goodness.

Wendy's Rating: *****