Sociopath by Patric Gagne

This was a very informational memoir. Since I work in the field of mental health, I found this first-person narrative of what it's like living with sociopathy very enlightening. I also liked learning the differences between sociopathy, psychopathy, and antisocial personality disorder. The majority of people use these three diagnoses interchangeably, which is understandable since the DSM-5 does not include sociopathy or psychopathy as standalone diagnoses.

Patric knew she was different from other kids at a very young age. She didn't experience any emotions like the people around her. She didn't feel guilty for hurting someone or doing something bad. She had no sense of remorse. This is one of the key symptoms of this diagnosis of course, but it was interesting when Patric explained that she felt something build up inside her that could only be released if she did something bad. Doing bad things allowed her to "feel" something, so that's why she did the things she did: breaking into homes, stealing things, stabbing a classmate in the neck with a pencil, and when she got older, stealing cars. Otherwise, she felt nothing.

Patric had to do a lot of her own research to understand sociopathy. She tried hard to maintain relationships with people she cared about, especially her mother, sister and her childhood friend/future husband, David. These are the people who seemed to accept her for who she was (for the most part.) Even though she may not experience "love" like the average person does, she does love people in her life. She certainly didn't want to lose them. I had a more difficult time understanding her relationship with her father. He pretty much forced her into the music industry (as a manager), but she ended up being really good at it. If you take away feelings like fear, guilt and empathy, you can be very successful in a ruthless business, which the music industry is. So, she became quite successful at it, even though she didn't necessary want to do it and eventually quit.

Patric's mission was to understand and accept herself and to live in this acceptance fully. She found herself always trying to mimic what other people did in specific situations so that she would fit in. With that being said, a lot of us do that! I did it myself for at least two decades of my life, so you don't have to be a sociopath to live in a way you think you should, rather than how you want. Honestly, I think that's human nature. I learned a lot however, and I'm glad that Patric was able to find acceptance and happiness with her husband and sons.

Wendy's Rating: ****