This book made me sad. How tragic that a woman would feel like she had to separate forever from her family who loved her, to "become" someone else that is more "accepted" in society and to live her life "freely". How sad that she lived a lie; that she felt like she could not share her truth with her husband or daughter. Since I have never experienced racism personally, and being born in the 60's, it was shocking to read about neighbors trying to prevent black families from moving into their neighborhood. Although I do remember something similar happening in my own neighborhood in the 70's when some of our neighbors tried to prevent a family from India moving into our neighborhood. I hadn't remembered that until I read this book. I know many believe that racism still runs rampant in our country, but I think we have come a long way from even the 1950s. Only in baby steps I guess. Our country may be "the melting pot" of the world (at least that's what I learned in grade school), but our progress towards total equality (between races; between sexes) has been slow.
The moment that Stella left Desiree and "became white", she must have realized that she could never be truly happy in her life. She seemed to really love her husband, Blake, and he seemed to really love her, but there was this huge "lie" between them. Obviously, this deception affected the way she raised Kennedy. Kennedy never seemed to feel loved or accepted by her mother. Stella kept her at arms-length away. Again, very sad. Stella's abandonment definitely affected Desiree's life deeply as well too. Desiree spent so much time longing for her sister that she wasn't living her own life to the fullest. In the end, she had a better relationship with her daughter, Jude, but some of that was Jude's doing. Once Jude understood her mother's life in more detail (and felt the same rejection that Desiree had experienced by Stella), then I think it tightened their bond. It's just a shame that everyone had to keep so many secrets, thinking they needed to "protect" each other from the truth. What a difficult way to live.
I wonder if Desiree would have married Sam if Stella had not abandoned her. Maybe she would have anyway since Sam appeared charming in the beginning. I know that Desiree felt like a failure to run home to Mallard and her mother, escaping her abusive husband, but I think that took courage and strength. Many abused women just stay with their abuser, which harms their children as well as themselves. I liked how Desiree developed a meaningful relationship with Early. How wonderful he ended up being, caring for Adele like she was his own mother. Another touching relationship was Jude & Reese's. They were so accepting of each other. In the end, Desiree and Jude (mother & daughter) seemed happiest to me, chasing their dreams and allowing them to unfold through hard work (Jude in med school) and taking a leap of faith (Desiree moving to Houston with Early).
This was not a "feel good" book, but it has a significant message, which makes it thought-provoking and meaningful. The ending left me feeling happy for Desiree and Jude; hopeful for Kennedy; and sad for Stella. You just can't live someone else's life and be truly happy on the inside.
Wendy' Rating: *****
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